'A' level is finally over!
YEAH! enough for books, assignments, tests and exams for now..
i dun think i wld wan to talk abt he exams.. so let's dun talk abt it..
this blog has been dead for so long tt i think it's time to reivive it..
oh by the way this is the 100th post for the blog! YEAH!! but actually no big deal la hor.. haha..
i think soon i will change the entire blogskin, tagboard, music, everything.. but it is nt the first thing on my list..
actually the first few things that i've once thought r the first few things on my 'to do list' r playing basketball, swimming n badminton... but all of these didnt come true.. wanted to swim today.. but it is raining non-stop..
after exams i thought i will feel relaxed, free and happy.. but i just realised these cannt happen too.. i thought i will be able to do wad i wanted n hope tp do b4 the exms.. but haha
after exams come naggin.. housework n packing.. so many restrictions that i begin to believe i will never can chill out, shop n have fun like a normal 18 yr old gal..
oh yah.. my bday was ages ago.. dun exam..
dun really wanna talk abt it.. but i guess i was very contented already.. at least my dad didnt throw temper tantrums at me n my sis like any other past bdays.. at least it was peaceful.. oh yah...my bro gave us each a little frame as bday present.. it is the first time in my life thus far tt he ever did tt.. nothing much happened... it was like any other day..
though i m officially 18.. i guess there wont be much change... i will still b treated like a kid or izzit a housewife? haha.. i mean a kid can play n ignore other things, stay innocent..
sometimes i thought mayb autism is gd.. it is an xcuse to ignore to surroundings.. have freedom to have ur own world.. relationship troubles dun affect...
haha
i have been alone for ages, i guess i m always trying to get used to it.. i have tried changing it.. but i guess i regret tt effort.. it brought more sadness n unhappiness instead..
so many false images constantly injected n protrayed into my mind..
tt when i finally wake up n realise tt r just plain dreams..
it is just myself being foolish..
i've always thought some things were wonderful.. little did i noe how disgustingly fake they were..
sometimes i hope i'd never have reaised.. to continue believing.. n i esp hate to realise it like straight after the , at the last day...
but den i realise its great to realise tt b4 hand.. to face the reality rather than to stay deep in false hopes...
wadever..
i sound like a kid..
i shl stop here

~ walk through life being you♥